The Slow Death of Comparison
Hello All (sorry this is centered, I can't get it to go over for some reason),
Today is Wednesday, and so, naturally, it is Woman Crush Wednesday and normally, this is where you write a nice post about a woman in your life, but today, I did this to myself, instead. This may sound somewhat vain, but since this is the year of learning to love myself, I figured, it was okay! haha! I went and renewed my license today, and although, I'm not posting a picture of both of those, below are two pictures, and as you can see, I've changed a lot.
Me at almost 18
Me, today, at almost 21!<3
I think that in these pictures, you can see less of a change in my appearance, than some others, but I think you get the point. I have changed more in who I am and how I carry myself, then in my looks, so if you met the 18 year old me and remet me today, you'd probably be a bit surprised at how different I am. People who have known me for years and didn't see me much between the months of November last year and March of this year, even saw a huge change in who I am. Honestly, I think that my year started in March and not in January. This is due to my month and half of figuring myself out. I've known who I am and who I am not, for awhile now, but I have never truly loved and accepted myself, until recently. This in turn, I feel, has definitely affected how I have been able to love and accept others, so I'm grateful for the changes!
I'd encourage all of you to journey into acknowledging every part of yourself and to change what needs to be changed, and love the rest of it. It is NOT SELFISH to love yourself, and it is NOT SELFISH to take time for you and allow yourself to discover all that you are! As humans, we will change constantly and adapt to our surroundings, but we need to love ourselves in order to fully be able to welcome and accept the blessings from above! When you take time to walk through your pain and past, you will be so much freer, healthier, and happier! No matter how much time has past, it is not too late to work through your feelings. There is no right or wrong way to feel about something, but there is a right and a wrong way to react to things, and that is where a lot of people have it backwards.
Another issue, is that we often compare ourselves to others and compare other people to other people, and that is just wrong! Sure, I can share something I've went through that is similar to your journey to help you, or maybe give you some insight, but in the end, we all have to get to where God wants us to be in our own way and no two paths are exactly the same! Comparison will slowly kill your self worth and your joy, and I truly hope that you haven't fallen prey to that! I find myself comparing myself to others, sometimes, but, honestly, I wouldn't want to be anyone else! Sure, do some people have what I hope to have in the future, in certain areas, but I will, probably, get there, and if not, I can be content with where I am. If you feel like you need to have this or that, and THEN you'll be happy then, you my friend, will NEVER be happy! It drives me INSANE when people say they can't live without this person or that thing, because they can! Sure, are there things I'd rather not live without and would be very, very, hard to live without, but I could, because my happiness is not tethered to anyone else, but me and Jesus...plus, no one, but Him is giving me oxygen last I checked so I'm pretty sure I'll live, til He takes me Home, no matter what happens!
It's hard to be single, sometimes, and I didn't want to live by myself this year, but God knew that I needed time to work through things to learn to be okay with just being myself without anyone else around. I'm pretty much an extrovert and I thrive on being around other people, but in order to be the woman God wants me to be, I had to learn to be okay just being and not needing others to distract me from myself, in order for me to be happy. I wish that everyone of you could have the resources and ability to just be alone with God for months (I had work, but in between that) and truly experience His comfort!
Everyone struggles, no life is perfect, and so comparing yourself to others will only make you miserable. If you instead, focus all that energy on finding the good things in your life, even if it seems small you will be all the better for it! I've always, been a pretty positive person, but lately, I've found that I'm even more positive than before, and it is SO nice! I get that this doesn't come "naturally," to some people, but you can make it a habit if you really want to. Habits are learned, not genetic...I know this first hand, partly, because a lot of my best friend's habits (some of which I really don't like) have become mine, because I'm around him a lot and look up to him in many, many ways.
My point, in all this rambling, is that we need to stop comparing each other and stopping asking "who wore it best?" and starting asking, "what did she/he wear best?" We need to compare ourselves to ourselves, because, more than likely, that will make you realize how great life is and far you've come! However, if it makes you realize that you want to be back where you used to be, or still aren't where you want to be, make an effort TODAY, to change that! Don't waste another second wishing you were someone else and be you! God made you in His imagine, and He loves you, so no matter what others say, or what you think about yourself, you are AMAZING!
I hope this post finds you in a good spot in your life, and if not, know that sometimes when we think we are getting buried we are really getting planted, and what's coming next, is going to be beautiful!
Until Next Time!
<3Abi
I'd encourage all of you to journey into acknowledging every part of yourself and to change what needs to be changed, and love the rest of it. It is NOT SELFISH to love yourself, and it is NOT SELFISH to take time for you and allow yourself to discover all that you are! As humans, we will change constantly and adapt to our surroundings, but we need to love ourselves in order to fully be able to welcome and accept the blessings from above! When you take time to walk through your pain and past, you will be so much freer, healthier, and happier! No matter how much time has past, it is not too late to work through your feelings. There is no right or wrong way to feel about something, but there is a right and a wrong way to react to things, and that is where a lot of people have it backwards.
Another issue, is that we often compare ourselves to others and compare other people to other people, and that is just wrong! Sure, I can share something I've went through that is similar to your journey to help you, or maybe give you some insight, but in the end, we all have to get to where God wants us to be in our own way and no two paths are exactly the same! Comparison will slowly kill your self worth and your joy, and I truly hope that you haven't fallen prey to that! I find myself comparing myself to others, sometimes, but, honestly, I wouldn't want to be anyone else! Sure, do some people have what I hope to have in the future, in certain areas, but I will, probably, get there, and if not, I can be content with where I am. If you feel like you need to have this or that, and THEN you'll be happy then, you my friend, will NEVER be happy! It drives me INSANE when people say they can't live without this person or that thing, because they can! Sure, are there things I'd rather not live without and would be very, very, hard to live without, but I could, because my happiness is not tethered to anyone else, but me and Jesus...plus, no one, but Him is giving me oxygen last I checked so I'm pretty sure I'll live, til He takes me Home, no matter what happens!
It's hard to be single, sometimes, and I didn't want to live by myself this year, but God knew that I needed time to work through things to learn to be okay with just being myself without anyone else around. I'm pretty much an extrovert and I thrive on being around other people, but in order to be the woman God wants me to be, I had to learn to be okay just being and not needing others to distract me from myself, in order for me to be happy. I wish that everyone of you could have the resources and ability to just be alone with God for months (I had work, but in between that) and truly experience His comfort!
Everyone struggles, no life is perfect, and so comparing yourself to others will only make you miserable. If you instead, focus all that energy on finding the good things in your life, even if it seems small you will be all the better for it! I've always, been a pretty positive person, but lately, I've found that I'm even more positive than before, and it is SO nice! I get that this doesn't come "naturally," to some people, but you can make it a habit if you really want to. Habits are learned, not genetic...I know this first hand, partly, because a lot of my best friend's habits (some of which I really don't like) have become mine, because I'm around him a lot and look up to him in many, many ways.
My point, in all this rambling, is that we need to stop comparing each other and stopping asking "who wore it best?" and starting asking, "what did she/he wear best?" We need to compare ourselves to ourselves, because, more than likely, that will make you realize how great life is and far you've come! However, if it makes you realize that you want to be back where you used to be, or still aren't where you want to be, make an effort TODAY, to change that! Don't waste another second wishing you were someone else and be you! God made you in His imagine, and He loves you, so no matter what others say, or what you think about yourself, you are AMAZING!
I hope this post finds you in a good spot in your life, and if not, know that sometimes when we think we are getting buried we are really getting planted, and what's coming next, is going to be beautiful!
Until Next Time!
<3Abi
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