Be Still and Know
Hey All,
So life has still been crazy since I last posted. My new job is pretty great and I'm very grateful, to God, for sending this opportunity my way! It's slightly "weird" being outside the kitchen for a change, but I enjoy mixing it up, learning new things, and getting this new avenue to show His love and light to my community! This enthusiasm about the new job doesn't mean that all my life has been amazing lately, and to be honest, parts of it have kind of sucked. Without getting into too many details, I'll just say my coworkers at camp are changing and despite my love of change, mostly, this change has made me bawl my eyes out several times, and I have a feeling it will continue to for awhile.
That being said, I have had an overwhelming peace about it all this past week or so since I had a long talk with my Creator. It may sound crazy, but it was one of those conversations where I actually "heard" His voice whisper to my soul, and if I hadn't been working at the time, I'm pretty sure I would've been brought to my knees, I felt His presence that strong. A few of the things He made me realize were one, that I was trying too hard to do His job of "making people pay," who had hurt me, and two, that if I trust Him with every aspect of my life, why wasn't I trusting Him with this one.
I'm not the type of person to seek revenge in the Carrie Underwood, "Before He Cheats," way, and I'm not the type to hold grudges for years on end over stupid things, but if someone hurts me deeply multiple times I often struggle with showing them the love I'm supposed to. I realize that is probably normal and I don't feel "guilty" because of it, since I realize that Jesus knows I'm just human, but I do try my best not to live by feelings and instead live by the truths He speaks to me through His Word and through my talks with Him. Currently, there a few people I'm having a hard time loving because they have unjustly targeted me, but since my talk with my Savior, I have found a peace about it all, and am finding it a little easier to let the Holy Spirit guide my speech and feelings towards these people which has been a huge blessing!
One of my biggest pet peeves is when people who know less than I do about something try to tell me how to do my job or tell me I'm doing it wrong. I love learning things and welcome suggestions on how do my job to the best of my abilities, but since I've been at my job for six conference seasons now, it's hard for me to be nice to new people who know little to nothing about why I do things telling me how to do it "better." However, even though I hate this, I sometimes do this to God, and put my expectations and desires onto Him and He lovingly told me that I was in the wrong in this area and that I needed to change how I handled things. He reminded me that it is His job to "make sure people pay," (Lamentations 3) who hurt me and that my job was just to show them His love, without letting myself get trampled on. This hit me to the core and I, honestly, had no words in response except that He was right. If He is my Creator and is the Creator of allll those who hurt me He should know best right? Well He does, and if I can trust Him with my jobs, apartment, money, car, health, etc, why can't I trust Him when it comes to relationships? I'm not sure I have the answer entirely, but since He pointed it out, my goal is to strive to make a 180 degree change in this area and I hope that through my blog posts you all will see the changes.
Some of you may not believe in God, and some of you may think I'm crazy when I say that I "hear" His voice, but I can only tell you from experience that He is so real and all you have to do is open your eyes and heart to see it! If you let yourself be still (Psalm 46:10) and listen to His Spirit, you'll be amazed and changed by all He desires to tell you!
I hope this post finds you well and that what He has taught me in the last week might resonate in your heart and maybe help make some changes in you as well!
Until Next Time!
<3Abi
So life has still been crazy since I last posted. My new job is pretty great and I'm very grateful, to God, for sending this opportunity my way! It's slightly "weird" being outside the kitchen for a change, but I enjoy mixing it up, learning new things, and getting this new avenue to show His love and light to my community! This enthusiasm about the new job doesn't mean that all my life has been amazing lately, and to be honest, parts of it have kind of sucked. Without getting into too many details, I'll just say my coworkers at camp are changing and despite my love of change, mostly, this change has made me bawl my eyes out several times, and I have a feeling it will continue to for awhile.
That being said, I have had an overwhelming peace about it all this past week or so since I had a long talk with my Creator. It may sound crazy, but it was one of those conversations where I actually "heard" His voice whisper to my soul, and if I hadn't been working at the time, I'm pretty sure I would've been brought to my knees, I felt His presence that strong. A few of the things He made me realize were one, that I was trying too hard to do His job of "making people pay," who had hurt me, and two, that if I trust Him with every aspect of my life, why wasn't I trusting Him with this one.
I'm not the type of person to seek revenge in the Carrie Underwood, "Before He Cheats," way, and I'm not the type to hold grudges for years on end over stupid things, but if someone hurts me deeply multiple times I often struggle with showing them the love I'm supposed to. I realize that is probably normal and I don't feel "guilty" because of it, since I realize that Jesus knows I'm just human, but I do try my best not to live by feelings and instead live by the truths He speaks to me through His Word and through my talks with Him. Currently, there a few people I'm having a hard time loving because they have unjustly targeted me, but since my talk with my Savior, I have found a peace about it all, and am finding it a little easier to let the Holy Spirit guide my speech and feelings towards these people which has been a huge blessing!
One of my biggest pet peeves is when people who know less than I do about something try to tell me how to do my job or tell me I'm doing it wrong. I love learning things and welcome suggestions on how do my job to the best of my abilities, but since I've been at my job for six conference seasons now, it's hard for me to be nice to new people who know little to nothing about why I do things telling me how to do it "better." However, even though I hate this, I sometimes do this to God, and put my expectations and desires onto Him and He lovingly told me that I was in the wrong in this area and that I needed to change how I handled things. He reminded me that it is His job to "make sure people pay," (Lamentations 3) who hurt me and that my job was just to show them His love, without letting myself get trampled on. This hit me to the core and I, honestly, had no words in response except that He was right. If He is my Creator and is the Creator of allll those who hurt me He should know best right? Well He does, and if I can trust Him with my jobs, apartment, money, car, health, etc, why can't I trust Him when it comes to relationships? I'm not sure I have the answer entirely, but since He pointed it out, my goal is to strive to make a 180 degree change in this area and I hope that through my blog posts you all will see the changes.
Some of you may not believe in God, and some of you may think I'm crazy when I say that I "hear" His voice, but I can only tell you from experience that He is so real and all you have to do is open your eyes and heart to see it! If you let yourself be still (Psalm 46:10) and listen to His Spirit, you'll be amazed and changed by all He desires to tell you!
I hope this post finds you well and that what He has taught me in the last week might resonate in your heart and maybe help make some changes in you as well!
Until Next Time!
<3Abi
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